Love Affair with My Mama

5 days until Mama Yuan graces me with her presence. And instead of devoting copious amounts of time and energy putting together scrapbooks, planning birthdays for my best friends, I spent days planning our mother/daughter itinerary. What does she like to eat? What yoga classes can we take? What NYC events can we explore?

My best friend asked me one day how I view the relationship with Mama Yuan. Something in me spurred me to respond immediately:

"My mom has completely transformed from being my mother to my best friend."

But the truth is - she isn't the one who transformed.

I was 22 years old when the first step to my transformation arrived - I wished it had been sooner, but there was a time for everything - I was grateful I received my gateway then. Somewhere between the braces or high school partying or getting good grades or all those swim/piano/singing/guitar/anything-i-wanted lessons, I always managed to shrug her off. Suddenly out of an ordinary homesick moment, I gave her my undivided attention where a hug became a passionate and love-filled embrace, and tears of frustration became tears of disbelief, respect and gratitude.

Somewhere - she got my attention with her stories - the ones I hope to write a poem, a story, a song about, or share with my kids. I marveled at how meticulous my mother revealed stories one by one in order of severity - what was appropriate for me at the time. But every piece she fed me, she compared herself to me - that I was her in some ways and in other ways more than her. I could not possibly imagine how I would be "more than her." She's the perfect mother, the perfect mix of lessons, laughs, all give / no take mentality, and the necessary tempers that made the mix feel so real, that made me understand the ingredients that made me who I am.

On the motherhood track, I always expected the nagging, the home cooked meals, the unconditional love that my "mother" provided.

But on friendship track, I craved the moments where "best friends" bared each others souls in the most naked way with no substitutions.

Mom - I cannot wait to show you my 10 day itinerary and spend those days being BFFs.